Humor
Solutions: Michelle Obama Proposes Vegetable Offsets for School Lunch Detractors
-By Warner Todd Huston
First lady Michelle Obama has been under fire since interfering in school lunches, but through the power of her husband’s control over the Department of Education, she has come up with a solution. Kids who don’t want to eat the veggies in their school lunches can buy new “Vegetable Offsets” from the DOE.
Teens are supposed to be fed up to 2400 calories a day, and new government standards say that a lunch may not contain more than 850 calories. But the new school lunches stocked with vegetables and other “healthy” choices have been thoroughly hated by kids across the country and waste has become a problem as kids would rather throw away the bland, less-filling meals than eat them.
School authorities in Tavares, Florida are even threatening to put in “garbage cams” to take video of offending children throwing away the unwanted school meals. No word has been released on what punishments will be meted out to offending students caught throwing away their veggies.
In another case, kids in Kansas went so far as to create a video that went viral. The song’s refrain is “we are hungry.”
But in a ceremony in the Rose Garden Michelle Obama unveiled a new program to give kids a way to skip eating their veggies if they must. The First Lady calls her new program “Vegetable Offsets.”
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Solutions: Michelle Obama Proposes Vegetable Offsets for School Lunch Detractors”
Separated at Birth: Rachel Maddow and Convicted Criminal Cameron Douglas
-By Warner Todd Huston
For a little Saturday fun, were these two people separated at birth?
Check out these photos of Cameron Douglas and Rachel Maddow and you decide.
Douglas is the convicted criminal son of actor Michael Douglas and grandson of famed actor Kirk Douglas. In 2010, Douglas was convicted of possession of drugs and sent to prison for a five year sentence.
Maddow is the host of MSNBC’s The Rachel Maddow Show.
Convicted criminal Cameron Douglas
MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow
Both are sick in the head, anyway.
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Separated at Birth: Rachel Maddow and Convicted Criminal Cameron Douglas”
In Mocking Undecided Voters SNL Misspells ‘Responsible’
-By Warner Todd Huston
Saturday Night Live made an error just as it was making fun of voters that are so stupid that they are still undecided about this coming presidential election and it doesn’t seem that the error was part of the joke.
The segment was set up as a fake Public Service Announcement, one featuring the confused ramblings of the “Low-Information Voters of America.”
These “low-information voters” were clueless about the whole election, so stupid that they didn’t even know who was currently president and if women were allowed to vote.
All in all, a fairly funny little faux PSA.
But the error, unless it was supposed to be part of the joke, comes in at the end of the video. There, at the bottom of the screen you’ll see a “claimer,” the sort you’d see at the end of a PSA that tells the viewer who is claiming responsibility for the ad.
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In Mocking Undecided Voters SNL Misspells ‘Responsible’”
Video: Navy Goes Gangnam Style
All Psy items are being removed from this blog. Want to know why? See: Gangnam Style Has been ruined for Me. F*ck You Psy.
Bob Is A Racist
Black And Right helps us learn what is and what is not racist…
Sadly, not a single liberal in the country will understand this video.
Devastating Youth Parody Song: ‘The Obama That I Used To Know’
-By Warner Todd Huston
You may be aware of the horrid song by Gotye called Somebody That I Used to Know. It is one of the worst songs I’ve ever heard. But that’s just me. Millions love the thing and it became quite a hit last year. It is so popular that many parodies of it have been posted to Youtube.
A pair of Harvard graduates got into the Gotye parody business, too, and their parody takes on Barack Obama in a most effective and devastating way. It ridicules the overly emotional high of “yes we can” and “hope and change” and reveals through the lyrics what a farce, a lie, a faux ad campaign Obama’s 2008 run for the White House really was.
The best line in this parody: “…but the change I got was that I moved in with my mother.”
If you can stomach the crappy tune that the parody folks were forced to use by choosing the Gotye song, this is a great video. Enjoy…
Devastating Youth Parody Song: ‘The Obama That I Used To Know’”
A Family Tragedy
A familial tragedy!
A Conversation With My 12 Year Old Self: 20th Anniversary Edition
10-word review: Kind of funny. Liked it. Worth the five minutes. Clever.
My Call to the Department of Justice Racism And Civil Liberties HOTLINE!!
-By Warner Todd Huston
My friend SooperMexican sends along the result of his call to Eric Holder’s DOJ Arizona racism hotline.
Says Soops:
When the news broke that the Department of Justice had set up a “hotline” to call in abuses of civil liberties in Arizona after the Supreme Court ruled on SB1070, I didn’t think much of it.
Now, I know that as a Republican white guy I am not allowed to have a friend who is Mexican. But I do. I also have a daughter-in-law who is Mexican. One to be that is from Puerto Rico. And I married a Korean. So, I guess I should turn in my white guy card.
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My Call to the Department of Justice Racism And Civil Liberties HOTLINE!!”
Funnystuff: Governor Christie and Mayor Booker: Don’t Worry, We’ve Got This
-By Warner Todd Huston
Governor Chris Christie gives us a bit of his sense of humor in this amusing video…
Amusing, I think. The Governor deserves some praise for venturing outside the box on this, I have to say. This was amusing enough to be worth the watch.
In fact, I’d say that this is funnier than Saturday Night Live has been for decades!
Short Movie: The Sacred Soil of Blood Creek…
Very funny stuff…
An Illuminating Interview With Australia’s Bill Shorten
This is a real interview. I have to say John Clarke and Bryan Dawe couldn’t have written anything funnier.
Bill Shorten is Australia’s Minister for Employment and Workplace Relations, and Minister for Financial Services and Superannuation.
While this was a real interview, here is the Aussie team of Clarke and Dawe, a comedy duo that did fantastic work making fun of oblivious government officials and the like in absurd interviews.
(H/T for Shorten interview The Spectator, and HotAir)
Video: DNC Planning Session Goes Terribly Awry…
I have now become a Hitler-gets-mad video maker. I just couldn’t help myself.
America: When Laughter Turns to Mourning
-By Rev Michael Bresciani
Fitful paroxysms followed Jay Leno’s announcement that Rick Santorum dropped out of the GOP primary race on Tuesday April 10, 2012. The crowd was so excited that Leno actually had to calm them a bit before he could go on with his monologue.
The jokes that followed offered further humiliation for Santorum, but Romney wasn’t excluded from the mockery. Leno said that Santorum proved he hated women by his position on contraceptives which got laughs, but even more laughter rang out when Leno added that Santorum proved he hated men, when he came against porn.
Next, Leno named certain Hollywood liberals who were now turning against Barack Obama, but the big wave of laughter came on the punch line that declared, yet, one more liberal that has decided to come against Obama – Mitt Romney.
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America: When Laughter Turns to Mourning”
Sunday Video Shorts Funny: Plot Device
A young filmmaker obtains a mysterious device that unleashes the full force of cinema on his front lawn.
Saturday Short Video Fun: The Action Hero’s Guide to Saving Lives
This is hilarious…
If At First You Don’t Succeed… You Must Be Ace Mulligan!
When lives are on the line… When there’s danger at every turn… When clichés run amuck… Sometimes the best thing to do is call Mulligan! Ace Mulligan! Starring PATRICK WARBURTON, “The Action Hero’s Guide To Saving Lives” is a laugh-out-loud action-comedy that takes you behind the scenes of Ace Mulligan’s perilous and not-always-successful mission to stop the bad guys, get the girl, and save the day. It’s not always easy being an action hero!
Produced entirely from concept to screen in just under 6 1/2 weeks and shot in 4 nights. This ambitious, micro-budget short was made possible through collaboration with a talented and dedicated cast and crew.
a Justin Lutsky film – EpicImageEntertainment.com
Staring: Patrick Warburton, Brett Simmons, Sean Naughton, Andrea Bogart
Produced by: Keegan Wilcox, Clint Carmichael, Justin Lutsky
Written by: Brett Simmons, Opie Cooper
Cinematography by – Jeff Dolen
Americans with Disabilities Act Necessity: Conservative, White, Male Bloggers NEED a Federal Subsidy
-By Warner Todd Huston
OK, you people, I am sick and tied of this. The Americans with Disabilities Act is NOT being fairly applied. That’s right. You read that headline correctly. Conservative, white, male bloggers NEED a hand from Washington. In fact, I’d say we have a right to it. We are being discriminated against even from those on our own side. It’s time for redress. I DEMAND a handout.
For years I’ve been wondering why the heck few of us white, male, bloggers ever make it big. Why aren’t there ever any white, male, conservative bloggers on TV or radio? Ever wondered that? There aren’t any. Think about it. How many can you think of? I can think of but one.
Oh, there are plenty of conservative Internet sensations that have made it big, mind you. There’s Mary Katherine Ham. Hot chick. There’s Michelle Malkin. Hot Chick and a minority to boot. There’s S.E.Cupp, no lacking the hotness there. There’s all the women from Smart Girl Politics, more hot chicks than I can shake a box of Viagra at (I did not get this from an online Canadian pharmacy. Really). Em Zanotti, Elizabeth Crum, Liz Mair, Pam Geller, Lila Rose, Susannah Fleetwood, Tina Korbe, Dana Loesch, Bettina Inclan — they are almost all married, or soon to be (good luck Bettina) so back off you slobs. Still hotness overload, already.
It isn’t just hot chicks, either.
There’s ZO!, AlfonZo Rachel. Despite being named “Rachel,” not a hot chick, but a black conservative guy. Then there is Kevin Jackson of The Black Sphere, another black conservative. Bob Parks of Black and Right — yep, black guy. Lloyd Marcus, ditto. La Shawn Barber, black female conservative. Star Parker also a female, black conservative. Many more, too. Joe Biden told me these are all clean and articulate bloggers.
As a side note, this whole minorities being conservative thing really chaps my hide. I mean, the left tells me that only white men should be conservative and all these minorities… well it’s just too much competition going on. Could it be that the left doesn’t know what they are talking about? I’m dubious.
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Americans with Disabilities Act Necessity: Conservative, White, Male Bloggers NEED a Federal Subsidy”
Sh*t Batman Says
No reason… it’s just funny.
CPAC Hair Doo Disaster
-By Warner Todd Huston
Being the king of sartorial splendor and a noted expert in haute couture (is it sad that I could spell that Frechified word without spell check?) it falls to me to dish about the worst hairdo at CPAC. That doo disaster belongs to Michelle Duggar of the famed doubling Duggars from TV. Call it a Garridoo Disaster.
Let’s leave ideology aside, as I find many of her ideas personally appealing, and let’s just talk hair, shall we, girlfriends? The Duggar doo was a disaster, plain and simple.
The whole thing seems to be a melange of styles. The poodle cut, the front flip, the long and straight, the perm, the mullet, even. All may work separately but together it is a hiarifying experience.
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CPAC Hair Doo Disaster”
A Democrat Dream Ticket for 2012: Weiner-Holder
This ticket is Barney Frank endorsed.
A VERY ZOMBIE HOLIDAY (Instructional video)
And hot chicks in black and white, too!
TV Show’s Cannon Ball Smashes Through Two Homes and a Minivan
-By Warner Todd Huston
On the lighter side, all one can say here is oopsie. You may be familiar with the show Mythbusters, a cable TV show that assess the veracity of urban legends. Apparently a recent episode was going to feature a cannon shot test. Unfortunately as they were preparing the test the cannon shot went off prematurely, much to the dismay of local homeowners.
Show hosts Jamie Hyneman and Adam Savage meant to shoot their cannon ball through several barrels of water and a cinder block to measure how fast the thing would travel. But as they maneuvered the cannon into position it went off prematurely, soaring up in the air and toward a local subdivision….
Read the rest at RightPundits.com.
Cowboys if OSHA Got Hold of Them…
A little Friday funny…
What’s sad is that it is so true. Thanks to liberals we’ve become a nation of wimps.
AP Uses Celebrity Impersonator’s Words as ‘News’ in Natalie Wood Death Story
-By Warner Todd Huston
Oooopsie. An Associated Press reporter was bamboozled by a celebrity impersonator in its recent story on the re-opening of the investigation into the 1981 death of actress Natalie Wood. The reporter included in his story of the death investigation some quotes from an impersonator of actor Christopher Walken heard on a Washington D.C. sports-talk radio show.
Actress Natalie Wood disappeared from a boat in Isthmus Cove, near Catalina Island in 1981. On the boat was Wood’s husband, actor Robert Wagner, as well as actor Christopher Walken. Apparently Wagner and Woods were engaged in verbal bouts, at the very least, when night fell. Woods disappeared from the boat that night and her body was found later that next day…
Read the rest at RightPundits.com.
Democrat Voters Hanging Around Until Nov. 2012
Chicago Democrats just waiting to vote.
Nancy Pelosi wishes you all a Happy Halloween, everyone.
Occupy Wall Street Video Shocker: Young Man Threatens Oakland Police
Pokesomi has hand cuffs and he’s not afraid to use them…
Occupy THAT, America!
If You Don’t Like Obama’s ATTACKWATCH.COM, You Are A Racist
Well, the Obama Regime has created a new website so that you can report anyone that says a cross word about the Obammessiah.
Yes, ve haf vays of making you report your neighbors…
I’m just wondering if AttackWatch.com has it’s “about me” info in the original German?