English Balls, Eco-Snitches & Filipino Whores: Headline Potpourri #11

-By Frederick Meekins

British Balls calls for mandatory sex education. The Secretary of Education there has announced that students over the age of 15 can no longer be exempt from compulsory instruction regarding human procreation and physical relationships. The parents of students failing to report to these classes could be fined or prosecuted.

Rosie O’Donnel denounced Glenn Beck as a carnival barker. If that’s the case, then as a lesbian, wouldn’t she be the bearded lady?

Cheryl Crowe is to be at National Christmas tree lighting. Wonder if this witch flew into town on a single sheet of toilet paper.

Are you morally obligated to obey a command from government that is not based upon any established law? That is the conundrum faced by a Perkaise, Pennsylvania woman who received a call from local authorities asking her not to dry her laundry on the clothesline and anonymous written threats from neighbors saying the practice made the COMMUNITY look like trailer trash. If these liberals are such prudes that they can’t stand the sight of someone’s unmentionables dangling in the breeze on private property, perhaps they should go back to the inner city slums they fled from even though they will continue to insist upon how much they embrace diversity.

The entire fiasco leading to the Kelo decision may have been for no other reason than to show that the power existed to do it. After demolishing the homes snatched from their owners, Pfizer has announced it has changed its mind and no longer wants to expand its complex on the disputed parcel.

With the government ready to seize control of a significant percentage of the U.S. economy in the form of pending healthcare reform legislation, it seems representatives of every form known of tyranny want their specific cut. And spiritual charlatans are no exception. Believing pain and sickness do not really exist, Christian Scientists want to be reimbursed for praying away something that is not even there to begin with.

A couple at a Philadelphia restaurant was hauled away in handcuffs for refusing to pay the mandatory tip over lousy service. If it is required, it should not be called a “tip” but rather a tax or a surcharge. Often the onus about tips is placed on the customer in terms that, without such financial outlays, the laborers in such establishments could end up being economically deprived. Why shouldn’t this be the proprietor’s responsibility? Say what you want, but one never has to put up with this nonsense in WalMart or McDonalds.

OneNewsNow.com reports that Sodomite terrorists are threatening violence against churches and Pro-life leaders if Obama doesn’t live up to the expectations of gays and lesbians. The online comments have be forwarded to the FBI for investigation.

Environmentalists claim global warming is forcing more Pilipino women into prostitution. However, it is not because they are hot and bothered. It is argued changes in climate decrease agricultural opportunities, compelling rural women into the cities in search of employment. Though potentially a lamentable development, this is frankly yet another attempt to guilt Americans into compliance with the radical environmentalist agenda. For aren’t the ones guilty of this transgression firstly any criminals that impress women into this practice against their will and secondarily those women that freely turn to this way of life rather than pursue more honest work, and the men that make this activity financially worthwhile.

One lone gunmen has nearly toppled the United States in terms of exposing the inability of the nation’s leaders to classify his deed as an act of Islamist terror. TV shrink Dr. Phil excused the mass murder on the grounds that the perpetrator may have been under considerable stress. One must ask will the same sense of clemency be extended to wife-beaters as well?

One might respond what else would one expect from an Oprah lackey like Dr. Phil because, if he does not give lip service to her religious universalism, he’s likely to find himself without a job in the spotlight. However, one would expect a bit more out of Fox News. Yet Shepard Smith exhibited one of the most spineless displays in the American media when he went on and on about not wanting to reveal the assailant’s name until absolutely necessary

The response from officials in government regarding the Fort Hood atrocity has been little better. President Barack Hussein Obama has yet to call Nadal Malik Hasan mmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmm mmmmmm a terrorist. Army Chief of Staff General George Casey basically said in an interview that diversity in the military is more important than the lives of U.S. service personnel. Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano speaking before an Arab audience in Abu Dhabi vowed not to crack down on subversive terrorists but to make the protection of Islamic sensitivities her top priority.

The White House adorned itself with a giant red ribbon for World Aids Day. Will there be a Christmas wreath this large placed on the front of the White House? If I was a bookie, I’d start a betting pool as to whether or not Obama will be able to say the name Jesus at the tree lighting ceremony. More importantly, will there be other decorations in honor of diseases that actually claim more victims but whose sufferers are less likely to throw hissy-fits if the world does not stand around and applaud how they came down with the affliction?
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Dr. Frederick Meekins is an Internet columnist. He holds a BS from the University of Maryland in Political Science/History and a MA in Apologetics & Christian Philosophy from Trinity Theological Seminary. He is currently pursuing a Doctor of Practical Theology through the Master’s Graduate School Of Divinity in Evansville, Indiana. Frederick’s research interests include Worldview Application, Christian Apologetics, The Implications of Aberrant Theologies & Ideologies, Futurology, Eschatology, Science Fiction, Terrorism Studies, Environmentalism, Education Policy and America’s Judeo-Christian Foundations. Frederick is also an ordained Non-Denominational Minister and listed in “Who’s Who In America” and in “Who‘s Who Of Emerging Leaders“. Media inquiries can be directed to: americanworldview@hotmail.com. His books “Yuletide Terror & Other Holiday Horrors” and “Provide For The Common Defense: Thoughts Concerning The Nation’s Enemies” are available at http://stores.lulu.com/fmeekins. His blog, The Epistolizer, can be found at http://epistolizer.blogspot.com.

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